A man who isolates himself seeks his own desire; he rages against all wise judgment. 2 A fool has no delight in understanding, but in expressing his own heart. 3 When the wicked comes, contempt comes also; and with dishonor comes reproach. (Proverbs 18:1-3 NKJV)
There is an ancient account of an Israelite judge, named Samson, who delivered the Jewish people from the harsh oppression of the ancient Philistines, who worshiped aquatic demons. These marine devils influenced the way that the Philistines conducted relationships, dating, commerce, finances, and even fashion. The story of Samson can be found in the Ancient Writings of Judges 13-16.
Although Yahweh, the God who created the universe, had a higher standard for optimal pleasure, health, financial prosperity, and longevity in relationships, Samson did not hold God’s same standard of purity and holiness. He did not base his perspectives on the instructions and wisdom that God established concerning healthy relationships, but he believed the cultural mores and values regarding relationships that his fleshly desires dictated to him.
In Judges 16, the “final chapter” of Samson’s life in the book of Judges, he “fell in love” with a Philistine woman named Delilah. Such was actually a toxic, unhealthy relationship that was based on superficial lust and narcissism, for they mutually took advantage of the other partner for one’s own pleasure, using control and manipulation for selfish gain. Neither person approached the relationship from a place of self-sacrificial giving and humble commitment, which is the love and character of God.
During the mind games the partners were playing with each other, Samson thought, “I’ll just shake myself free from her trap, just like all those other times.” But when God’s anointing (supernatural influence, power, and strength) departed from Samson because of his spiritual compromise, he no longer had the supernatural strength or grace to withstand his enemies as he once could.
For those who know God intimately, it behooves us to watch out for that same complacent attitude of pride and to break agreement with it (by replacing a proud mindset with the attitude of Jesus or mind of Christ (see Philippians 2:5ff ; Ephesians 4:17-24 ). God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. The good news is that temptation and sin (going into the wrong spiritual territory) will not have dominion over the person who encounters and remains connected, rooted, and grounded in God’s love (see Romans 6:14; John 8:31-32; John 15).
Samson fell away from grace when he put his trust in his own spiritual track record and abilities (see Galatians 5:4; Hebrews 12:15). He proudly assumed that God would back him up as usual after he broke the terms of his particular Nazarite vow with God. However, when Samson hit rock bottom and humbled himself once more, God’s grace gave him supernatural strength once more to take out the enemy in his death.
He who separates himself seeks his own desire, he quarrels against all sound wisdom. 2 A fool does not delight in understanding, but only in revealing his own mind. 3 When a wicked man comes, contempt also comes, and with dishonor comes scorn. (Proverbs 18:1-3 NASB1995)
Back to the opening passage to this article in Proverbs 18:1-3, Samson isolated or separated himself from the godly counsel of his God-fearing parents because he wanted to gratify his fleshly, carnal desires. He wanted to sleep with the world (or “the enemy”), despite the consecrated calling on his life to lead Israel as a just judge. In that place, Samson quarreled or broke out against sound wisdom.
Sound wisdom or healthy judgment says not to go near the house of the harlot, which is something that Samson did (see Judges 16:1-4; Proverbs 5-7 ). He still carried God’s anointing and his action seemed to have no negative consequences.
However, that did not mean that God approved of his behavior, even though Samson still had supernatural strength to escape the city where his enemies lay in wait to kill him. In a sense, Samson’s act of sleeping with the prostitute did not go without consequence, for it may have strengthened Samson’s proud assumption that he could get away with such a lifestyle.
This spiritual smugness and illusion that God was all right with Samson’s sexual immorality led Samson into a relationship with Delilah, who was his downfall. Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall. He lost his eyesight because of his pride and lust, for sin has consequences. However, there was grace for Samson’s supernatural strength to be restored when he humbled himself, but it came at the heavy price of his physical death.
We give “the flesh” [or devilish nature] the opportunity to manifest itself by feeding it with various selfish behaviors in search of a dopamine rush in order to “feel loved.” However, if we die to ourselves by denying those “lusts of the flesh” or “temptations” to have any place in our lives, then we can walk in victory over bad habits and mindsets that will make us worse off in the long run.
The power to do so rests solely in further understanding and experiencing what Jesus did when he shed all his blood on the cross, put the powers of hell to open shame, died, won the keys to death and of the unseen realm, and rose from the dead (see Revelation 1).
According to Proverbs 18:2, a fool does not delight in understanding, but only in revealing his own mind (or heart). Samson told Delilah “all his heart” when he shared with her about the source of his great physical strength.
However, even though there is a proper place for being vulnerable and sharing our hearts and emotions, it needs to be in the context of safe people who are rooted and grounded in the love, wisdom, and character of God. Delilah was not truly such a “safe person,” even though Samson felt safe with her.
Delilah made Samson feel good “as a man,” but the relationship was based on selfishness. Both were not surrendered completely to the One True God, but were merely taking from each other in order to get a dopamine rush of pleasure in order to feel loved. Samson was foolish and did not delight in understanding God’s ways when it came to His standards of purity and holiness. If he did, then he would have listened to the sound wisdom and godly counsel of his parents in Judges 14.
Instead, it would seem that Samson arrogantly dismissed his parents with an attitude of “Oh, what do they know? They just don’t understand. I have grace to do whatever I please in this area, for I know what I’m doing and what I’m up against. I am strong enough and smart enough to navigate my way through relationships with “girls”/ladies/women. So I don’t need accountability here in this area of relationships because I’m doing just fine. God has given me supernatural strength, and nothing can hinder me.”
According to Proverbs 18:3, “[w]hen a wicked man comes, contempt also comes, and with dishonor comes scorn” (NASB1995). Pride produces shame. “When pride comes, then comes dishonor, but with the humble is wisdom.” (Proverbs 11:2 NASB1995)
Pride led Samson to destruction and his haughty, arrogant spirit led to a spiritual downfall where he lost his supernatural strength (or anointing) and his enemies gouged his eyes out. Afterwards, Samson’s enemies scorned and mocked him as they led him out into Dagon’s temple to gloat over him.
When a minister falls into sexual immorality today, “the world” or “secular culture” operates in much the same way. They mock, scorn, ridicule, and criticize the church. “You see! I told you the church was full of hypocrites. You thought this pastor-type individual was such a mighty ‘man of God?’ Well, look at him now. Ha ha! You losers! If your God is so real, good, awesome, and powerful, then why can’t His leaders control themselves or want to obey Him? Why are they such hypocrites who preach against the very things they do? That’s why I don’t have to follow your God. Your God is not real, and you’re wrong to be such a fool in your delusional trust. There is no God; He won’t hold me accountable for my lifestyle and choices.”
It may be sobering to remember what happened to such scorners next in the story of Samson. God never condoned Samson’s immorality. He never stopped Samson from gratifying his fleshly desires because He gives His children the free will decision to listen to Him, walk with Him, obey Him, love His counsel and instruction, or to reject His wisdom, counsel, and instruction.
A love or trust relationship is not possible without the free will ability to either receive that love or to reject it. To paraphrase J. Warner Wallace, if a woman writes a man a Valentine’s Day poem that says, “Roses are red; Bullets are lead; Love me or I’ll put one in your head,” then is that truly a love relationship? By definition, love requires the choice to either engage in that committed relationship, or to walk away from it.
What happened to those scorners in Dagon’s temple? They died. Their own pride and scoffing came before destruction, and their arrogant, haughty spirits came before a fall (see Proverbs 16:18).
The temple of Dagon literally fell down on top of them, and they died. This is a reliable statistic: 10 out of 10 people die. What happens after death? We face the God whom we chose to either scorn in selfish pride or to submit to in love and devotion.
We won’t be able to blame those hypocrites and moral failures in the church when we stand before God to account for our own lives. Those hypocrites and moral failures in the church will have to stand before God and be held accountable for their lives, and we will have to stand before God and be held accountable for our own lives.
If two children abuse and fight one another, then their parents will have to deal with both children, not just the one “who started it.” The child “who started” the offense might get dealt with more severely, but the child who took the bait and acted with angry retribution will be held accountable for his/her own response to that offense.
So then, based on Proverbs 11:2, 16:18, and 18:3, pride leads to shame (or disgrace) which results in scorning (or mocking or being made fun of). Finally, at the end of this process, pride leads to destruction, a fall, stumbling, or an untimely end. Samson’s proud attitude resulted in his spiritual fall, where his enemies gloated over him. However, the Philistines’ proud gloating was short lived, for their proud rebellious lifestyles and worship of the marine demon, Dagon, led to their own deaths as well.
How then, shall we respond and live? To further search into what it means to have a relationship with God, see my “Good news” page , where you find articles that explore what it looks like to know God personally.
