Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess. At various instances throughout her life, she encountered some relational traumas that left her feeling alone and confused. One day, she got into a big argument with her family. After this encounter, she felt unheard, unloved, uncelebrated, unnoticed, rejected, inferior, ashamed, and ostracized. Still hurting and reeling from the piercing words of those people who were supposed to make her feel safe, she fled into the woods.
As the princess walked along, she spotted a beautiful serpent in a tree. The colorful scales of this snake were vibrant and bright, like a glorious rainbow of creativity, mystery, and awe. The princess’ raging torrent of emotions began to calm down and subside as she gingerly stepped closer for a better look at this magnificent beast. Step by step, she inched closer as she gazed into the reptile’s piercing and mysterious eyes.
The closer the princess got to the serpent, the more understood she felt by this creature. It was as if the serpent could feel her pain and did not judge her for it. Gradually, inch-by-inch, moment-by-moment, she reached out her hand to that beautiful creature. The serpent received her touch with a gentle, understanding countenance. With time the princess and the serpent became even more comfortable with each other, such that the snake could freely hang around her neck like a necklace or a “feather boa.”
When the princess walked back into the village for family dinner, she still felt that tension of hostility in the air. At the dinner table, her brothers asked her about that serpent hanging around her neck. One of them made an off-the-cuff, disparaging remark about her choice in friends. The princess felt unheard, criticized, and attacked. Bitterness began to bubble up deep inside her as hurts started to resurface. The fear of rejection quickened her heartbeat as her body geared up for “fight-or-flight.”
Her hand started to squeeze around the serpent’s tail a little more tightly. As she continued to listen to her accusers as those voices in her head replayed old, painful memories, she didn’t realize how her fingernails were becoming more embedded in the serpent’s skin. Suddenly, as if without warning, the serpent hissed in pain and bit the princess. Tragically, the princess’ body was flooded with deadly poison, and she died that very evening.
Questions for discussion:
- Was the serpent beautiful? What was beautiful about the serpent?
- How did the serpent [initially] help the princess?
- When they met in the forest, how did the serpent make the princess feel?
- Was the serpent [really] good for the princess?
- How should the princess have treated the serpent?
- In hindsight, what advice would you give to that princess concerning the serpent?
- What do you think that healthy conflict resolution with her family might look like for the princess?
- What dangers were present regarding the princess and the serpent?
Questions for deeper discussion:
- Is it possible for something to appear outwardly “beautiful” when in reality it is filled with deadly poison?
- Is it possible that various attitudes, behaviors, or habits might initially make a person feel better or numb pain, but that in the end can cause greater anxiety, depression, disease, and even death?
- Is it possible that various mindsets or lifestyles might initially diminish some uncomfortable and painful emotions, but that long term can bring toxicity and worse pain to our life, health, and relationships?
- How might you advise the princess to let go of the serpent or to get rid of it?
- How would you demonstrate love, care, and compassion to the princess?
- How might you help the princess to deal with those negative emotions with which she was struggling?
See this “Good news” page for a list of articles examining how a personal relationship with God can help us to address those toxic emotions with which we struggle.
